Thoughts on Marriage Near my 1/3 Anniversary

I signed in to my WordPress account tonight so I could comment on someone else’s blog. The check box under the password – Remember Me? – sounded more like a plea from my lonely blog than it probably intended. So, here follows random thoughts from these last few months of being a new bride!

– Marriage has been such a natural transition for Greg and me. And that’s odd. For many couples today, marriage is just a change in legal status – where they are living and what they are doing doesn’t change dramatically. So, I can understand such couples feeling like marriage is no big change and completely “natural.”
For us, on the other hand, marriage meant radical changes! I mean, I’m living with a boy for the first time.
Our laundry gets all mixed up in the washer. We share a toothbrush holder and a mailbox. We fall asleep together for the first time.
Marrying each other was a major, life-altering event, but the transition to living and working and praying and sleeping with another human being has felt like the most natural thing in the world. (Except doing the dishes with one another, but I think I mentioned that earlier in my post discussing pre-marital counseling and submission. We’re getting better.)
I’m very thankful to God for that naturalness. We’re learning a lot about each other and how to live as a God-honoring husband and wife, but the newness doesn’t feel weird. It feels like I’m learning about a home I’ve never known until now.

– Greg does feel like home. Two months after our wedding, I took a week-long trip to the northwest for a conference. While I had a wonderful time learning and hanging out with a dear friend, the city felt dark and sad to me – like it desperately needed God’s light to pierce through. Hearing Greg’s voice when I called home was a light and warmth and peace. Thanks be to God for those who point us toward His light!

– On a lighter note, I’ve learned that Greg’s contact case looks a lot like mine when I sleepily reach for a case in the morning. It’s very confusing to put contacts in your eyes and still not be able to see.
(And it’s embarrassing to do this multiple times.)


– I’ve been reminded how good and faithful God is to answer prayers that make us more like Him. One particular evening, Greg was praying out loud in his usual honest, rambling manner.

And it drove me nuts.

I started praying, Lord, help me love him. Lord, help me love him. Lord, help me love him. (I am rarely one for eloquent prayer!)
God did, by doing two things:

1. He showed me that I was getting to witness the intimate conversations between my dear husband and my even dearer Lord. Yes, it was a rambling and perhaps unclear conversation to me, but that’s because it was real. What a privilege to listen to the tender heart of my husband pouring out his inmost thoughts to the One he loves the most!!

2. He showed me how to pray with Greg.  I’ve always been one to pray in images: I picture people where they are, and I see God come close and touch them. I see visions of portions of heaven and feel God’s love. I (try to) envision just how big God is, and how His arms wrap around the whole universe.

So, when Greg was praying, God gave me an image of my prayers dancing around the text of Greg’s prayers like a sprite. A dainty, graceful sprite that leaves gold-leaf filigree in her wake around the letters of Greg’s prayer.  It illuminates them. It was beautiful to see how my image-prayers complemented his heartfelt-words.

And now my dear husband has finished his homework (comments on marriage during grad school another time), and I’m off to make sure our contacts go in the proper cases.



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2 responses to “Thoughts on Marriage Near my 1/3 Anniversary

  1. Pingback: One-year Anniversary!! « Musings of an Indian pixie

  2. So many couples today are wrestling with problems in their marriage–ranging from infidelity to abuse to more mundane things like arguments about the bills and the chores. Please join me in offering prayers that anyone with a troubled marriage finds peace, solace, and comfort in their union. Certainly, love is common to all religious traditions. So let’s join together and direct all of our spiritual energies toward the goal of bringing love back to couples whose marriage is foundering.

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